The Dysphoric Mormon

Coming out is hard. In fact the act of coming out to others is one of the hardest parts of living a more authentic life – at least in my experience. My life shifted dramatically after I came out, my life’s trajectory had suddenly shifted and I started down a path that isn’t the typical straight and narrow. In fact, my path was very winding and confusing. Relative to the “straight and narrow”, this was a path that wasn’t typically taken out of fear of being different or seeing it as an evil path because it’s not what religion necessarily teaches. 

One of my goals after coming out was to draw closer to God. To show people that no matter who you are or how you identify, that there is a place for you in His Kingdom. But it’s not God that will gate keep those from entering His Kingdom. Why would He? Is He not supposed to love us unconditionally, no matter who we are? The truth of the matter is that God would not do that to any one of us if our hearts and intentions are pure and earnest. After I came out, my membership to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints became heavily restricted. I lost my calling as a teacher to the youth, I had to get permission from leadership to even bear my testimony, I couldn’t participate in classes that better aligned with my identity, and I was shunned by others – folks that I had once called my friends. Yet I persisted. I wanted to prove to others that you can be a faithful transgender member.

I am creating this blog as a safe space for others who may be suffering from gender dysphoria as a resource. Quite frankly, the other blogs out there are outdated and full of weird stories from the perspective of individuals that don’t understand what dysphoria is. In truth, this blog has a personal purpose of serving as an outlet to express my feelings but that it can also serve as a resource for those of you who may be suffering either in silence or not. Anyone that has some sort of deviation from prescribed religious and societal teaches and ideology knows what I’m talking about. My purpose is to never lead anyone astray from their religion, even if I no longer participate in my own. No, my purpose is to tell my story as unbiased and honest as I can.

Welcome to the Dysphoric Mormon.